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Paul described both concepts, “Make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose.
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for you own personal interests, but also for the interests of others” (Philippians 2:2-4).
Paul emphasized the importance of this next building block: encourage, don’t criticize, condemn, or complain. Building Block 3: Respect If I constantly criticize you, it will eventually descend into contempt – on both our parts.
He wrote, “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear” (Ephesians ; cf. The opposite is to express respect, which is part of the process of building positive relationships. Perhaps that is why Paul instructs wives to, “respect her husband” (Ephesians ).
Building Block 5: Breaking Deadlock When conflict escalates to a certain level, people stop talking to each other.
Research indicates that in good relationships there is a five to one ratio in favor of positive encouragement over negative criticism. Learn to listen and understand their interests and point of view. This will take you far in building positive relationships.
I cringe at some of the boneheaded things I have done that made a good relationship with good people turn bad.
Let me share with you some things from the Bible I have learned.
There is always the potential for more conflict, but good people with good motives need to talk.
But, you head first for common ground, not fighting ground.